Girls Day = Memories of Grandma

March 3rd is Girls Day.  When I was a little girl, my grandmother would give us special gifts.  We grew up with Sanrio goodies.  Hello kitty, Little Twin Stars, and other cute characters.  Our special gifts would usually be something from Sanrio.  I would love the cute smelly pencils and smelly erasers.  These treasures would be so pretty that I would have a hard time using them.


My grandmother passed away September 2007, 2-1/2 months before Dakota was born.  The last time we saw my grandmother was the night everyone was called to the hospital.  We stopped to buy her flowers and a little hello kitty doll caught my eye.  It reminded me of her because the doll was dressed up in a beautiful Japanese kimono.  My grandmother is full Japanese and we grew up with the culture.  On the way to the hospital I had every intention of giving that doll to her.  Somewhere along the drive, I realized that we may never see her again because things were not looking good.  I decided not to give the doll to her.  My heart told me that I should keep it as a reminder of the last time I saw her.  Before we left, I told her "I love you", and she said "I love you too".  It was the last thing we said to one another.  I was right.  It would be the last time I would see her.  My mom called early the next morning and said she passed away shortly before she called me.


I'm not sure why but Shirokiya is a place that makes me feel her presence.  It was her favorite store and all our lives she had taken us there.  Now, on her birthday or on Girls day, I find myself wanting to just go there, walk around and just be still and remember her.  Besides going to her urn tomb the day we laid her to rest and on the first anniversary of her passing, I have yet to visit.  To me, I do not see her as being there.  I find peace and feel close to her at my mom's house where she was living before she passed away.  I like to visit Shirokiya, her favorite store and Kunio, her favorite Japanese restaurant.  These are the places she was always found when she did feel like going for an outing.


This post was not intended to be about my grandmother.  I guess that's just where my heart wanted to go today.


I have 5 daughters, 1 granddaughter, 1 niece, and 1 special lady in my son's life.  On girls day, I am reminded about how lovely life is having girls, the beauty they bring to this world and how powerful a force they will be.  Having these special girls in my life has shifted what girls day means to me.  From my memories with my grandmother and my sisters to just being grateful for having special girls in my life.  


Happy Girls Day!

xoxo, Salena

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A Special Day

Today we celebrate my son's birthday.

23 years ago today, I gave birth to a son.  He was 3 weeks early due to a little car accident, of all places in the hospital emergency parking lot.  By the time I got home the contractions started, so I turned myself around and drove back to the hospital emergency room.  I started going into active labor but it was too early.  I was only in my 4-6 months time frame of my pregnancy and baby was not done growing.  The doctor put me on medication to stop the contractions and I was sent home.  No joke, the day I was told to stop the pills to let labor happen naturally in the safe zone of the end of my pregnancy, I went into labor.

My sister was with me in the delivery room and that was the night of a statewide blackout.  Lucky thing the hospitals have emergency generators cause I was freaking out.

No epidural {yeah, it was not offered to me, it was years ago} and hours later, he was born.

Happy Birthday Kapono!

To read more about his journey you can click here.

Today we remember my Grandma May.

September 2007

4 years ago today, My grandma passed away in the same hospital where my son was born.  The night before she passed away, we were all called to her hospital bed to spend as much time as we could with her.  Before we left for home, I told her I loved her and she said "I love you too".  Those were the last words we ever spoke to one another.  In the morning, my mom called first thing to tell us she was gone.  She had been having medical problems for a long time.  She would go into the ER, be admitted, stay a while, then come home fine.  This went on for many years.  

I just assumed it was another one of those times.  

I took for granted that she always came home.  

I didn't get to spend enough time with her.

What was she feeling before she died?

What was she thinking?

Did she have a full life?

I didn't take the time to ask her about her life.

When my mom told me she was gone, I knew it the time was coming and this is just the time she would not be coming home.  I didn't really know how to feel.  Even at her funeral I had no idea what I was thinking.

There are some days when things will remind me of her.  We will go to places or have events as a family and will remember her or wish she was with us.  Girls Day is special to me because we were raised along side her Japanese customs and traditions and she would always make it a big deal.  I love to go to Shirokiya on her birthday or on days that I miss her.  Just to be surrounded by the place that she loved to shop and take us to get little Sanrio or Hello Kitty trinkets makes me feel close to her.

I am not one to visit her grave site because I don't see her as being in that urn tomb.  I want to remember her where she was happy and talking about the memories we have about her.

I miss her so much.  She would laugh and cry and all the females in our family have this curse.  Seriously, the term "dying laughing" must come from our family genes.  

She was a master seamstress.  A great cook.  She loved her grandchildren and at the end of her life, they were the ones who kept her going.  I love to remember how she would clap her hands ever so slowly and put her hands up to sing twinkle twinkle little star to all the babies.  She loved to hold them on her lap.  They would ride on her lap when she was in her wheelchair and she would hold them tight.  She loved to go on long rides around the island.  She loved Japanese food.  Her favorite was sashimi (raw fish) and soft shell crab.  Her favorite restaurant was Kunio in Waikele Shopping Center and my husband took me there last year on our anniversary and I missed her.  All of her special occasions were there at that restaurant.

My two younger girls have never met her.  I was pregnant with Dakota when my Grandma passed away.  Dakota was born 2-1/2 months later.  I don't like the fact that my younger 3 will not remember her but only for what we tell them.  It makes me sad.  I know that is life and our memories and stories will keep her alive but I still don't like it.

I miss her.  I wish I knew more about her.  I was surprised of all the things I didn't know about her when I sat in the pew at her funeral.  She was a very special lady with a very special life.  I wish I had more to share about her with all of you.

My grandma was the first of my immediate family who I lost that I was close to.  My other 3 grandparents were not a part of my life and I don't know anything about them.

All my heart,

Salena

Tuesday Ten :: Memorable Places

Ten Memorable Places

1. Diamond Head Lookout

why: my husband proposed to me there

2. Alaska

why: honeymooned there and fell in love with the place

source

3. Kaka'ako Park

why: many of our pre-marriage dates were there and it's the place where I danced a special hula for my husband while we were dating

source

4. Ala Moana Beach Park

why: it's the place where Aleshanee had her first experience with the beach as a baby

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5. Waimanalo Beach Park

why: my grandmother used to take me and my sister there all the time.

source

6. Shirokiya at Ala Moana Shopping Center

why: my grandmother's favorite place / Japanese food and all things Japanese /  she would buy us Sanrio stuff which is why I'm so obsessed with Hello Kitty and other Sanrio characters till this day

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7. Dole Cannery Plantation

why: we love to take our kids there to feed the Koi fish at the pond in the back, ride the train to tour the plantation and finish the day with yummy frozen pineapple yogurt

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my girls feeding the koi fish

8. A side street near The Waikiki Shell

why: first kiss with now husband =)

9. Kaiser Moanaloa Hospital

why: my 3 older kids were born there

and

it's the last place I said "I love you" to my grandmother and she said "I love you too" the night before she passed away

10. Kapiolani Hospital for Women and Children

why: it's where we took our long journey from infertility to having our 3 little miracles

All my heart,

Salena

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